"The cobbler's children wear no shoes." Yes, even sleep consultants have children with sleep challenges. Yes, even sleep consultants are exhausted moms that love their coffee...till cocktails. A little reality for you today.
Dear Half Consumed Cup of Coffee,
I wanted to drink you. I had every intention of drinking you fresh from the pot, piping hot and rich and full of coffee and caffeine happiness. I tried. I sat down; I took a sip. I took another and then yet another. You were good Coffee and you deserved to be sipped and treasured until the very last drop. Alas, my children had other ideas for you. Every morning my cherished moments of coffee sipping are interrupted by their alternative plans and incessant needs. I can’t blame them too much, my darling Coffee, as they are children and not allowed to partake in the robust and scalding hot pleasure that you bring and thus, they are ignorant to your bliss. It is a tortured struggle with my endless pleading going ignored. I beg, “PLEASE let mommy finish a cup of coffee!” and “FOR THE LOVE OF GOD ALL I WANT IS A FFFFFFFffffffffffuuuu…CUP OF COFFEE BEFORE YOU START HARASSING ME!” they just don’t understand…they can not. OH Coffee! I wanted you so badly that I even re-heated you, committed to drinking you my love. I know you don’t want me to re-heat you, I know you prefer that I not destroy your original flavor and chip away at your integrity but Coffee, I really wanted to drink you and I love you even if you aren’t at your best. As is often the case, one of those ignorant pains in the asses got to me again before I could get to you. It was tragic! The microwave kept chirping away “beep….beep” letting me know you were still in there awaiting my return, which came far too late.
Coffee, I am sorry that I placed you aside on the countertop and spent the remainder of my day cruelly ignoring your presence. I am sorry that in a moment of great weakness I replaced you with a store bought version that had a high price tag and none of your cheery “good morning sunshine” character.
I love you Coffee and I will always love you…until we meet again tomorrow morning,
Exhausted Moms Everywhere.